The Hanged Man's hate list

Although I do the I hate Monday articles (some of these maybe future articles) some things aren't worth writing a full length article on and others are just one word answers for example "I hate chairs" what can I write about chairs?!

I hate...
1. Chairs

2. Penguins: Evil bastards hell bent on world domination!

3. Christmas: more trouble than it is worth you are better off just living on Grinch Mountain with me, Scrooge and Miss Havisham

4. Windows live (gaming): Installing Fallout 3 DLC with this thing is like giving birth while cutting your toe nails with garden sheers.

5. Call of Dutards: Did you know there are other games out there? INCREDIBLE isn't it?

6. Xbox fanboys: I may own a PS3 but that doesn't mean I like it, people say PS3 fanboys are the worst. I personally haven't ever met a PS3 fanboy because everyone who has a PS3 has reason to complain. I have met obnoxious 10 year old Xbox fan boys.

7. FPS games that want to be COD: Medal of honour 2010 anyone?

8. Cyclists: Yeah that's called a pavement... you aren't supposed to ride your bike on there...

9. People who shut down shared computers: I wrote about this on "I hate Mondays"

10. Bus travel: There is so much wrong with it.

11. Airports: I think the "terrorists" used to be people who were just sick of waiting for their god damn plane!

12. Airport security: Oh what's that? You didn't find 12 layers of semtex after making me unpack my bag? Why am I not surprised!?

13. Holidays (or vacations if you are in America): I would be more relaxed spending 2 weeks sleeping in and surfing the net...

14. Americans who say "How come Brits can't speak OUR language?" It's called ENGLISH asshole look up its origin.

15. Telemarketers: They do however provide entertainment for those who are forced to listen to them.

16. Telemarketers who cannot speak English: I want to say this isn't a race thing, but if you are ringing me up from a call centre in India it had better be good! Don't just mumble!

17. Doomsday theorists: No that isn't the end of the world... it's an eclipse.

18. Film remakes: Why not remake a film that failed into something good? Not something brilliant into something that fails.

19. The Wicker Man remake

20. People who say "Fallout 3 is too big! I can't find my way out of the vault!” I want to murder your first born son.

21. People who don't read error messages: If a message comes up in front of you it isn't to entertain you... if you read if you may find the answer to your problem.

22. People who write like this "I ammmmm going 2 da prom 2night who wonts to com?” Why is mud splatting up the window? Oh I think that is Shakespeare rolling in his grave.

23. People who blame you for their mistakes:

Death1337zor: It's YOUR fault that I punched that witch in the face!

Me: Care cup -> \_/

24. People who say "I considered suicide": Yeah so did I oddly enough last week, I was walking down the road and saw a bus and thought... "Hmm I could throw myself in front of that... (Bet you wish I did huh?)" Then I thought "Naw that would REALLY hurt." Then I carried on... maybe I should sell my story. *note this is mostly in chat magazines I don't hate people who REALLY have a problem.

25. Chat/Gossip magazines:

This week in Heat: Jordan says she wants to get back with Peter.

This week in OK: Jordan exclaims that she is "So over Peter." (I think you can see where I am going with this...)

26. People who idolize stupid people: Look he is in prison for violent crime! Why do you look up to him?

27. People who write lists: Like this one ;)

28. People who own an Ipad: I hate you...

29. Ipads themselves: I hate YOU more.

30. Iphones

31. QR codes: Screw these things! They are an eyesore and they were obsolete 1000 years ago!

32. Bus stop zombies: Put an article up on "I hate Mondays"

33. Pop music: I just hate it soooo much... Lyrics are retarded, melodies don't exist anymore and the people who sing them dress like toss pots.

34. Rap music: This is FAR worse at least pop attempts a tune of some sort

35. People who gave a budget to make Fred the movie: You should be fined for that.

36. Fred: Yes I see you... no I don't care...

37. The BNP: Kick out retirement plan out the country! We are ok working till we are 90!

38. Spam: Think I want this garbage?

39. People who go out of their way to find something to complain about: like this blog for instance...

40. Modern warfare clans: Notice no one over 12 is in a Modern warfare clan?

41. Clantags: Having "1am0bn0x1" us as your name or "<ZNT> Moron <ZNT>" just makes me want to kill you...

42. The playstation move: Who was paid to make this garbage?

43. People who kick you for having high ping: Yeah it's what I deserve for having connection problems... even if it doesn't affect my game play.

44. People who say "Uncharted is the best PS3 game EVER": PS3 exclusive? Maybe I could argue this maybe true, But as far as ALL PS3 games are concerned "Uncharted>Oblivion"? YEAH RIGHT!

45. People who say Mass Effect 2 is the best game ever: It's always 1/2 in the top 100 in PS3 mags WHY? It has few RPG elements and I had more fun playing Dragon age. Put Oblivion or Fallout 3/NV up against it and it doesn't stand a chance!

46. COD online: EURGH!

47. People who shoot your horse in Red Dead Redemption: HAHAH you are SO original.

48. People who overuse internet memes: I hate internet memes; really it's just something to replace creativity. People who literally speak in internet memes? Please...

49: internet memes: see above...

50. Tour guides: It's like the boring parts of Assassins creed!

51. People who play their music loud through a speaker on a bus: Hey have you heard of headphones? They are a great invention which prevents people from hearing your horrible taste in music!

52. Lost planet the game

53. People who stick chewing gum under tables: GARGH FUCK! What did I just put my hand in? Oh that is vile!

54. Jeeves on ASK.com: I hate that asshole so much... I click on his head to make him change hats, in hope of putting a bear trap on his head!

55. PE: Physical Education was the worst subject in high school, it's so pointless. Not only this but you never feel like you have achieved anything unless you are actually good at it. Getting a C in an exam is good at least, coming 4th place in a race? Not so much...

56. PE teachers: If I had a shotgun... I swear...

57. RE: I hated Religious education in high school, simply because there was no right or wrong answers "some Muslims think this while others think" could we apply this to ALL subjects? "Some people think 2+2=5 other people who are not morons do not, however."

58. Twilight: Don't get me started

59. Twilight New (shit) Moon

60. Twilight Breaking wind

61. Everything else with Twilight in its name! (Because of Twilight)

62. Robert Patterson: Please... don't make me rant on this.

63. Leona Lewis' cover of hurt: Before that fat whore came along Hurt was associated with the painful reflection of a recovering drug addict and the long look back over a man's life while he was on his death bed... It is now also associated with a stupid bitch who cracked a nail, can't remove a stain from the coffee table and didn't get a very good tip of her "client" last night.

64. Leona Lewis' cover of run: Someone needs to kill this bitch before something else bad happens...

65. Bloggers

66. DVD: I think I'm the only person who misses VHS for simplicity, not that DVD is complicated you understand but it has too many stupid pointless features.

67. Blueray: I only own 1 blue ray and I don't see the point, the quality isn't better than DVD from my perspective and it has yet MORE pointless features.

68. People who talk really loudly while on phone calls: Especially on public transport... bastards.

69. People who read gossip magazines: I want to beat these people to death with their own magazines...

70. The bins: Blue, Green, Black, Brown and purple? GARGH I HATE MY LIFE! I wouldn't mind, but some tosser is just going to fill up the paper bin with beer cans or vegetable waste anyway contaminating the lot.

71. Paranormal activity: That is some of the scariest shit I have ever seen, I mean someone got a budget to make that god awful film!

72. Simulator games: Bungee jumping simulator is about as much of a bungee jumping simulator as bungee jumping off a coffee table onto a mattress with a crash helmet on...

73. Transport driving simulator: Hmm... Do I want to buy a game about driving a tram? Or a game about surviving a zombie apocalypse? Damn choices...

74. Facebook: I hate this site... maybe I miss the point of it but for me it looks like a porch light for morons.

75. The Weather Forecast: Is it EVER accurate?

76. Arrow in the knee jokes: HAHAHA you are soooo funny...

77. Channel 5 (in the UK): It has absolutely NOTHING worth watching...